Saturday, April 16, 2011

New at this, need to vent I guess.

I guess I just need somewhere to vent all my feelings and all the stress that I have right now.  My husband and I are on year 2 of trying for kids with nothing but crushed dreams.  Ugh.  Plus, we are just getting over some financial issues that started during the past 2 years.
Okay, I guess I can start with the first part of this issue.  My husband and I started trying for kids just before our 1 year wedding anniversary.  That was just over two years ago, and even after two months on clomid last summer all that we have to show for this is three known miscarriages.  It's really frustrating to know that we have been wanting and trying for a kid when others can get within ten feet of sperm and they are pregnant.  I am just fed up with being the outsider when hanging out with my friends who all have kids.  Currently we are working with yet another doctor to see if she can figure out what is wrong with me without resorting to drugs.
Okay part two of the issue started sometime during the past two years.  We started getting stupid with our money and had a few issues which got worse when I had my first known miscarriage last May.  Since then we have fixed our issues and everything is back in order.
Now I have decided to start getting things back on track in life.  We have our finances back in order and next is my health.  I bought a bike to start getting in shape and try to lose some weight.  I am also starting a new diet after Easter, which my good friend is on and has had great results in just a week.  I have been feeling very enlightened lately and am trying to fix everything that is going wrong in life right now.  I know that god has a plan for me, however, I am sick of waiting to find out what that plan is!